13

i smile inwardly as i type the title to this blog.  13.   of course.

i wake up easily.  surfing a bit through the net before i get ready, i hear thunder.  then the downpour of rain starts.

dummy me with the no umbrella runs to the car, overcoat over my head.  i slide through shiny wet streets to the hospital, parking as close as i can to the buildings.  by then, the deluge has softened to splatterings of moisture.

still, i wished i could walk between the drops.....

i went into the radiation room, and change into my robe.  "it's still raining!" i call out to the fascinating wig lady (who's rhoda to-day).  she giggles hoarsely, and goes back to her book.  (i find out later that it's called the professor and the madman.  "who's winning?" i ask.  "wellll.....they're both friends now."  coolness!)

i should be writing more.  i should have brought a notebook to the waiting room....but the rain limited me, and forced me out the door without making allowances for my creative mind.  i'll have to see about tapping into my muse later.  there's a an uneasiness to me right now.... a bit of something inside that needs to come outside....even if it's just to play in the rain.

time on the board is longer to-day.  for some reason, they have to reboot the thing that guides the laser, and it ends up taking 2-3 minutes, technician time (five to six minutes jamison time).  i'm so relaxed that i end up snoozing.  the nurse is very apologetic, but i told her i needed the nap.

(i like this nurse.  she has the habit of saying "i'm in the room...." as she comes in, so she won't surprise me.  there's something reassuring in that.  "i'm in the room... it's almost over...."  i need to find some way of using this phrase in my work.)

not much else to-day.  overall, i'm not as tired as i was, but it may be because i slept well last night.  i can't wait until i can start walking....or biking..... or stretching....anything to get the kinks out of me.  sometimes, i feel extremely tense, as if i could curl up into a hard ball, and never get straight again.

soon, i'll be able to set myself free.